The Quran

Preface

يا أَيُّهَا الَّذينَ آمَنوا لا تَدخُلوا بُيوتَ النَّبِيِّ إِلّا أَن يُؤذَنَ لَكُم إِلىٰ طَعامٍ غَيرَ ناظِرينَ إِناهُ وَلٰكِن إِذا دُعيتُم فَادخُلوا فَإِذا طَعِمتُم فَانتَشِروا وَلا مُستَأنِسينَ لِحَديثٍ ۚ إِنَّ ذٰلِكُم كانَ يُؤذِي النَّبِيَّ فَيَستَحيي مِنكُم ۖ وَاللَّهُ لا يَستَحيي مِنَ الحَقِّ ۚ وَإِذا سَأَلتُموهُنَّ مَتاعًا فَاسأَلوهُنَّ مِن وَراءِ حِجابٍ ۚ ذٰلِكُم أَطهَرُ لِقُلوبِكُم وَقُلوبِهِنَّ ۚ وَما كانَ لَكُم أَن تُؤذوا رَسولَ اللَّهِ وَلا أَن تَنكِحوا أَزواجَهُ مِن بَعدِهِ أَبَدًا ۚ إِنَّ ذٰلِكُم كانَ عِندَ اللَّهِ عَظيمًا

Yusuf Ali

C. 189 | [33:53-73] Believers should cultivate refined respect
In social and spiritual life. As the Mothers
Of the Faithful have to uphold their dignity,
So should all women protect their honour
And uphold their dignity. The Hour
Will come when all Evil will be punished.
Fear God, and always speak the word
That leads to Right. Arduous is the Quest
Of Mankind’s high and noble Destiny,—
Beyond the reach of other creatures:
Let man but strive in Faith, and fulfil
God’s Trust, —by the grace and mercy of God.

O ye who believe! Enter not the Prophet’s houses,—until leave is given you,—¹ for a meal, (and then) not (so early as) to wait for its preparation: but when ye are invited, enter; and when ye have taken your meal, disperse, without seeking familiar talk. Such (behaviour) annoys the Prophet: he is ashamed to dismiss you, but God is not ashamed (to tell you) the truth.
And when ye ask (his ladies)² for anything ye want, ask them from before a screen: that makes for greater purity for your hearts and for theirs.
Nor is it right for you³ that ye should annoy⁴ God’s Apostle, or that ye should marry his widows after him at any time. Truly such a thing is in God’s sight an enormity.

The rules of refined social ethics are as necessary to teach today as it was with the rude Arabs whom the Prophet had to teach in his day. Those mentioned in this verse may be briefly recapitulated thus: (1) Enter not a friend’s house without permission; (2) if invited to dine, don’t go too early; you are asked to dine, not to wait for the preparation of the food; (3) be there at the time appointed, so that you enter when you are expected and invited; (4) after the meal, don’t get familiar with your host, especially if there is a great distance between him and you; (5) don’t waste time in tittle-tattle, causing inconvenience and perhaps annoyance to your host; (6) understand what is proper behaviour for you, he may be too polite to ask you to depart. All this has a spiritual as well as a social bearing: respect and delicate consideration for others are among the highest virtues.
The actual manner of showing respect to ladies may be different in different circumstances. But it is an essential principle of good society to show the greatest deference to them. To the “Mothers of the Believers” this respect was due in an exceptional degree.
Considering his position, the holy Prophet deserved to be respected before all other men and nothing should be done to cause him the least harm and annoyance. This applied not only during his lifetime, but it applies now, because his teaching and personality are alive to us. It was not fitting that his widows, both for their own position and for the position of the Prophet, should be married by other men after him. And this mark of respect was duly observed in history.
“Annoy”: Āẓā (IV) may equally mean: to vex, to cause hurt or injury, to insult, to ill-treat by slander or unseemly conduct, or hurt the feelings of (some one). The Prophet came with a divine mission to teach and reclaim the world, and he is entitled to the respect of all, even of those who do not consciously acknowledge his mission, for his mission works constantly like the forces of nature. In a minor degree the “Mothers of the Believers” are also entitled to respect.